One complaint buyers have about salespeople is their lack of creativity. The salespeople who contributed these horror stories made astounding – and very creative – recoveries. Many even made the sale.

An Explosive Presentation

Monster.com member silvija tells how she accidentally incorporated showmanship into her presentation:

I was representing a line of patio furniture and lighting, and I finally set up an appointment with a major department store chain’s buyers. The morning of the appointment, I realized I had forgotten to bring the manufacturer’s light bulb. So I stopped at a local hardware store and picked up an ordinary bulb. The fixture I was demonstrating had a four-foot pole and a globe. As part of my demonstration, I knocked over this fixture to show it couldn’t be broken. It was always impressive and earned me a lot of orders. That morning, when I knocked over the fixture, the bulb exploded with a huge bang and puff of smoke. It scared everyone in the room (myself included). I quickly unplugged the light and turned around to face my customers. I said, “And that, gentleman, is what happens if you do not use one of our specially developed outdoor bulbs with this fixture. As you can see, the fixture itself is undamaged, and had I placed one of our bulbs in it, this demonstration would not have gotten your attention so effectively as it would merely have bounced. You will notice that no harm has come to the fixture itself proving my point of it being durable outdoors. However, I do strongly recommend you advise your sales people to urge customers to buy the specially developed bulbs as well and provide yourselves with continual sales in that area.” I got the sale.

The Accidental Salesperson comments: That’s thinking on your feet. Good save.

An Alarming Tale

Monster.com member heyhuck recalls this embarrassing moment:

My boss and I were headed to Chicago to pitch a new client during peak holiday travel time. The alarm on the airport metal detector sounded as I passed through. I had on a thick, full-length wool dress coat over my best black suit. I removed my badge and made a second attempt as my boss stepped aside to watch me once again set off the alarm. Soon I was removing layer after layer of clothing passing though the metal detector again and again until I was asked to step aside. The security woman scanned my body up and down several times with the metal detector wand. Each time she passed my chest the alarm sounded. “It’s the underwires on her support bra,” the guard loudly announced to my waiting boss and the queue of travelers. My boss quietly suggested I do a little shopping in Chicago before going home.

The Accidental Salesperson is duly impressed and alarmed himself.

Seat Protectors Don’t Protect You From Embarrassment

Monster.com member pattyb writes:

I was working in the corporate office of one of the nation’s leading food chains. I walked into my supervisor’s office to ask for a raise. What I didn’t know is that the seat protector from my recent bathroom visit was firmly plastered to my posterior, and I paraded around the office for more than 45 minutes before anyone noticed or said anything. No raise that day.

The Accidental Salesperson responds: You did raise a few eyebrows, I’m sure. And speaking of cling-ons…

Turn the Light on When Getting Dressed

Monster.com member quietwest contributes this gem:

Years ago, my husband was the general sales manager for a car dealership. One morning, he overslept and was in a rush getting ready to go to an early sales meeting. The dryer was running, and he pulled his shirt out and put it on in the semi-darkness. It was very hot that day, and as he was conducting the meeting, he took his suit jacket off. Unknown to him, there was a pair of lace panties stuck on his back.

The Accidental Salesperson comments: If this had only happened in a country club locker room, and if he had been wearing your panties, and if they had been pink—this would have been the lead story.

Imitating Sharon Stone Will Get You Nowhere

Monster.com member kenreld lost a sale this way:

During a major sales presentation, I could tell that my boss was attracted to the VP we were presenting to. She would repeatedly cross and uncross her legs with the skirt moving up higher and higher. Finally, the CEO came in, and my boss froze. For more than an hour and a half, she sat there with her legs crossed. When it came time to leave, her leg had fallen asleep and would not support her. She collapsed to the floor and required assistance to leave the room. We didn’t get the deal.

The Accidental Salesperson quips: Because she didn’t have a leg to stand on.

Check back monthly for more of the funniest and most embarrassing sales horror stories. Keep ‘em coming!

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